Narcissists are like chameleons. They will always change to adapt to their surroundings to blend in and be like those around them. This guest post explores how the Narcissist is always "becoming" something else.
THE NARCISSIST IS NEVER A BEING...THEY ARE ALWAYS A "BECOMING"....you are who you are, with flaws and faults, kindness and love...but a narcissist doesn't have a stable identity. There is no "ME" with a narcissist. I once asked my NarcX why she didn't just be herself, and in a rare moment of honesty, she said..."I don't know who I am." That's the narcissist.
The narcissist is not a being, but rather a "becoming"...they are always in a state of flux, depending on their situation and who they are talking to, and what they want, plus how they plan to use these people and this situation to get supply. A narcissist is a chameleon, and like that lizard, they change with their surroundings. If they can get supply by pretending to care, they will. If donating to a charity gets them recognition, they will do it. The chameleon narcissist always looks for the right words to say and the right way to act to get attention and approval...aka, supply...from their audience. I am reminded of the TV show "The Impostor".....but unlike the show, the narcissist is never "themselves"...there is no self. So, when watching a narcissist, you can watch the ebb and flow of the fakeness in progress. That's why I say they are not a being, they are always a "becoming." However, at their rotting core, they have an evil, and the aspects of that evil are "them", such as it is. Liars, cheaters, abusers, cruel...the enjoyment of abuse, willing to do anything to get what they want with no moral values, utterly evil...but, what I mean by there being no "them" is that what people see changes all the time...like a shape shifter. The inner rotten core is and always will be the same, but what we all see has no reality to it. Everything...EVERYTHING...is a manipulation. Never forget that. When you speak to a narcissist, you ARE being manipulated. It's how they live.
**This was reprinted with permission from Soulmates in Hell. The blog was originally published on October 13, 2015.
1 Comment
maya
10/5/2019 11:17:57 pm
Hello! I love your blog and facebook page as well. I have placed a link to your blog (under "Useful Links, Blogs), and to the facebook page near the beginning of the page titled "How We Got That Way". Please let me know if you approve (and if not I shall of course remove the links!) and if you would like to share a link on your site to mine, please feel welcome. Here it is: https://unbamboozling.weebly.com/ Blessings to you, Warmly, Maya
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