You might not be aware that it is happening. But it is something that both you and the Narcissists use within the dynamic of the relationship. It is called reframing and it is something that you need to be more conscious of in your dealings with the Narcissists.
According to Collins English Dictionary, to reframe is to “change the focus or perspective of a view through a lens” or “to say something in a different way.”
So by that definition then, reframing within a Narcissistic relationship occurs when the Narcissist causes us to shift our focus in regards to how we view an event. This is to blur any clarity we may be getting that allows us to see the Narcissists for what they truly are.
How it works
Think of any event. Any day to day occurance in the home. How did you react? How did the Narcissist react?
Some examples of reframing that occurred often with my NX:
What reframing does
Habitual reframing is consistent with brainwashing because as the Narcissists reframe again and again, you get programmed to get used to it. This technique is meant to wear us down. To demean and belittle us a little bit at a time. To condition us to allow them to keep getting away with abusing us.
Until I began my healing journey, I had no idea what reframing even was. I didn’t even know I was actually doing it! I was making allowances for his abusive behavior. I was explaining it away. I was making excuses to myself, and to my children. But now that I know what it is, I haven’t fallen into the trap of doing it anymore.
Have you experienced reframing with the Narcissists? Comment below. And as always, I appreciate you for sharing your stories with me.
Like the FFNAEA Facebook page by clicking the icon below!
Greetings, my warrior survivor friends! Welcome to my blog. I'm Julianna, the owner and creator of this site. Check out the My Story section to read about why I started this blog. Thanks for stopping in. And feel free to comment on any post, share your own thoughts and stories. I would love to hear from you!
The Top 10
Here you will find my most popular posts for easier discovery.
How Narcissists Make Sure You Never Solve Problems In A Relationship
The Fake Apology
How I Lost My Identity
Effects of Emotional Abuse
Emotionally Abusive Behaviors
Tightening Your Facebook Privacy Settings
Why You Should Never Defend Yourself Against The Narcissist's Smear Campaign
Going No Contact: A List Of What To Do And What Not To Do
An Open Letter To All Survivors Who Just Got Out Of An Abusive Situation
The Great Manipulator
©2016-2018. Freedom From Narcissistic And Emotional Abuse. All rights reserved. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material (in full or in part) without the express written consent of this blog's author/owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Freedom From Narcissistic And Emotional Abuse with a link back to the original content.
The content of this site is told from the blog author/owner's personal experience of dealing with a male Narcissist. Narcissists, psychopaths and sociopaths are both male and female, and come from all walks of life. Furthermore, the content contained herein is not intended to be a replacement for medical or legal counsel. This blog's sole purpose is to provide support to those who have endured Narcissistic and Emotional Abuse.