After the Narcissist, life is chaos. That's exactly how the Narcissists want it. They want to see you struggle....and fail. But there is a way to get your life back!
Reclaiming your life and getting back to who you were before the Narcissist isn't easy. In fact, it's downright difficult. You'll have some pretty horrible days as you head down the path of healing and recovery. (But, you'll have some good days, too.)
The following ways to get back your life are in no particular order.
Finding a therapist who is familiar with narcissistic and emotional abuse is essential. The person will be better equipped to assist you in your recovery. I had a therapist in the town where I lived after my NX discarded me who wasn't familiar with it at all. While she did start me in the right direction with providing me with reading materials, it didn't help me get to the nitty gritty.
I also attended group therapy at a women's shelter in that town, as well. That's where I was introduced to the Power and Control wheel, and the book But He Never Hit Me by Dr Jill Murray. Those 2 things were quite instrumental in getting me further down my healing path. My eyes began to open further.
It wasn't until I got to the city I currently live in that I found a therapist in a women's shelter who was very familiar with emotional abuse. I was officially diagnosed with PTSD and she introduced me to EMDR therapy. (Read my blog posts PTSD As A Result Of Narcissistic Abuse and EMDR: How It Helped Me for more.)
A critical step to getting back your life after the Narcissist is creating boundaries. If you have to have some kind of contact with the Narc (like if you have children together), then boundaries are a must. It could be as something as simple as the Narc not being allowed to disrespect you , especially in front of the children. Or it could be being firm with no calls past a certain hour.
3. No Contact
To get your life back after the Narcissist, it is essential to cut off all contact with the Narcissist. It will keep you from being tempted to run back to them or accept phone calls, texts or emails. (Read my blog Going No Contact: A List Of What To Do and What Not To Do for more.)
4. Try new things
Part of getting your life back also consists of getting back out into the world. Do something different. Try something new. Learn a new craft or hobby, learn how to scuba dive, go camping with friends.
Put yourself out there. I know it'll be scary. But it's an important step in getting back your freedom, your sense of self, and your confidence.
How have you gotten your life back after the Narcissist? Comment below. And as always, I appreciate you for sharing your stories with me.
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Greetings, my warrior survivor friends! Welcome to my blog. I'm Julianna, the owner and creator of this site. Check out the My Story section to read about why I started this blog. Thanks for stopping in. And feel free to comment on any post, share your own thoughts and stories. I would love to hear from you!
The Top 10
Here you will find my most popular posts for easier discovery.
How Narcissists Make Sure You Never Solve Problems In A Relationship
The Fake Apology
How I Lost My Identity
Effects of Emotional Abuse
Emotionally Abusive Behaviors
Tightening Your Facebook Privacy Settings
Why You Should Never Defend Yourself Against The Narcissist's Smear Campaign
Going No Contact: A List Of What To Do And What Not To Do
An Open Letter To All Survivors Who Just Got Out Of An Abusive Situation
The Great Manipulator
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The content of this site is told from the blog author/owner's personal experience of dealing with a male Narcissist. Narcissists, psychopaths and sociopaths are both male and female, and come from all walks of life. Furthermore, the content contained herein is not intended to be a replacement for medical or legal counsel. This blog's sole purpose is to provide support to those who have endured Narcissistic and Emotional Abuse.